GRiTS

Marriage Equality

I’ve lived in Massachusetts for the last 12 years.  During the debate about marriage in MA, my stated opinion over and over was “of course we should have equal rights to marry, but it’s not that big of an issue to me”.  Then the bill passed.  And I got one of the biggest shocks of my life.  I sobbed.  I sobbed for quite a while.  I couldn’t believe the emotional response that I was having.  Obviously this meant more to me than I was willing to admit.  Since that time, I’m no longer surprised by my emotional response to a state passing marriage equality. 

And today, here I am a married man, not surprised when the tears began to flow as I watched the Washington State Senate debate marriage equality (for the second time). I’m still stunned to see heterosexuals discuss what rights I should have.  I’m amazed when on rare occasion the majority actually “bestow” equality to a minority.  Today, I’m still surprised, relieved, elated, angry, hopeful and sad for the people that came before me and didn’t live to see this.  I’m also aware of my own internal homophobia and how long it’s taken me to realize that I AM EQUAL and that the laws DO MATTER to me.  That we all should be treated the same.  It still scares the hell out of me that I have to rely on someone who is not like me “bestow” equality and that’s a small part of why I’m still so emotional when on that rare occasion, I actually see heterosexuals support equality.